Friday, October 22, 2010

Friday-This is the day,Lord has made

Everyone tells me Fridays are the best days of their lives. Half of the time I agree because I don’t like arguments and other half because it really doesn’t matter to the other person what I think. Either way there is a general notion that Fridays are very popular among humans stuck in a 5-day week job schedule.
This is a Friday and I’m bored. Jumbo bored! I’m in office, I have work. The problem is I’m in no mood to work. Primarily because I have no clue how to go about with this piece of assignment and then because I’m itching to blog.
But on Fridays I’ve found myself working more.
  • It’s a dine out with friends which implies no cooking
  • I can get back home later and not worry about waking up early in the morning.
  • The thought of weekends itself is so inspirational.

So it goes without saying that I do most of the weeks work on a Friday. Yes this includes all the bad, ugly, trashy works too. Sometimes I think it’s my devious mind at work. This one makes me work so hard so that it leaves an impression with my bosses.”Gosh!!That girl! The way she works that too on a Friday!!”

(GRIN!!)That’s the cheesiest grin I can afford now with people sitting around me attempting to work. Now I’ll give you some serious tips on how to act busy without getting any work done.

  •  Facial Exercise. It’s on days like this one should learn to control the facial expressions. The act itself is not easy. You need to stare at the monitor, head cocked to one side. It will be nice if you can wrinkle your brows and occasionally pout. REMEMBER, it is very important not to smile at all. You can always make slight noises like “tut,tut,Uff,How could I!!”

  • Drink lots of water. It helps to de toxify.The only part of the body which works is our tapping fingers and muscles around our eyes straining to keep them open. We eat like a famine stricken mangy dog and work out like a pig. Drinking water (without any alcohol) helps cleanse the system. You can take rather frequent trips to the wash room. Walking is an exercise .People assumes you are pregnant or you have a bad case of food poisoning or kidney stone. Works fine for me.

  • Google is God. Didn’t understand? If you have a net connection(if you don’t have stop pouting and get one!!) type any random word like Aztec,Mayan,Pollution,India and Rhombus etx.You’ll definitely get a result. Conspiracy theories are the in thing. Someone would’ve thought of a bizarre connection. Browse away to oblivion. It will not be harmless to open couple of windows related your field of work in case your boss decides to drop by. Now that you’ve opened make sure it’s about the latest trend in the market. It’s the shortest way to impress someone. Like today I’m learning about Lambda expressions in C#.I like the way it sounds. Sounds exotic.

  • Blog-Blog-Blog. Now don’t roll your eyes and tell me that you cannot access blogs. I know, silly you cannot. Most corporate know that their valuable resources would be busy writing nonsense (like this) if allowed. But now is the trick. Listen to me. Write down all you can on word document. Edit it and style it. You have 8 hours to do all this. That’s enough time for a post. Mail it to your personal id with a very generic subject like.” Daily Activity Details-<YourName>”.No one wants to know the details. Go home, check personal mail and post it. Yes honey, you should’ve met me earlier. Well better late than never.

Rome was not built in a day nor is the knowledge behind the content of this blog. The above is the easiest top four tips for beginners. There are more they are not for beginners nor are they free. Feel free to use the combination of above to accomplish greater heights in evading useless work. So till I publish and get myself banned from corporate world its 1-2-3 poof to work!!

[Statutory Warning: The post is just for fun and author personally does not believe in non-commitment toward work in general. But then some days are plain boring.]


  1. lol.. that was inspiring.. thanks for tips

  2. @Harish:Thanks...Check Dilbert comics online(never in office) for more tips..